Goal Setting – What’s getting you out of bed in the morning?
Every morning, in those first few moments when you realize it is time to get out of bed, what are the first thoughts that cross your mind? “Please, 5 more minutes…” or “It’s so nice and cozy, I wish I could stay here”, or is it “I better get going so I am not late for work…” are some of the common things that I used to have flutter across my mind. If you are at all like I used to be, I dreaded starting the day, as it represented all those things I did not want to do, work, errands, paying bills, the commute, bad weather, the list went on and on. Then one day, I realized, it was not all that “stuff” that was the problem, the problem was me!! I really did not have a reason, a plan, a goal, a mission to accomplish, that drove me forward. It was my fault the world was imposing itself upon me, and I needed to set some goals to change my outlook on the morning.
Now, if you are reading this blog, I am confident you have probably read many different blogs, books, articles about the powers of goal setting. I will defer to the wisdom you have already amassed on goals, and propose we build upon these teachings. There is some great content on goal setting, however I believe most fall a little short. Most experts teach two types of goals, being “Statistic” Goals, or vague “Expand Your Vision” goals, which I think are a good start, but there is a step missing… transforming these goals into “Feeling” goals.
The two types of goals you are probably familiar with. Statistic goals, such as “make $10000 a month” or “increase my sales by 25%”, or even “get out of debt” are the most common, but also the ones that lead to the most failures (and negative feelings when you don’t reach them). Expand Your Vision goals are less common, “where would you travel if money was no object” and “if you could live in the house of your dreams, what would it be like”, invoke great positive emotions, and are designed to stretch your mindset, so you see yourself in the future, and you are motivated to gain new skills. Both these are powerful tools, and have helped many people achieve amazing results, but the next generation of goals include your Feelings, or an emotional component, that goes beyond logic and incorporated all of our senses.
Feelings and emotions might just be the missing ingredient between your current goals, and your success. Let’s look at my original example of getting out of bed, logically not a complicated nor difficult task, but it is the positive feelings of staying in bed, conflicting with the negative feelings of facing your day, that keeps you glued to the mattress. Ask yourself, why do you love going on vacation? Describe your best vacation ever. Do you describe the schedule, how much it cost, how much you saved, in other words, the statistics, or do you have a flood of emotions and memories, with a wave of colors and sounds that take you back in time. It is that attachment you have to those emotions and what you experienced with your senses that made it so memorable, and so desirable to relive, not the stats.
Setting Goals is using these same systems, just in reverse. Deep down, we are still primitive creates, acting on instinct, searching for food, safety, and what makes us feel good, and avoiding what makes us feel bad or is dangerous. And that is why Goal Setting is so powerful, and it is so important for us to set our own goals, and specifically, ones that make us feel good about our future. It is pointless to set goals that do not engage our emotions, or our senses, because regardless of how much positive thinking you do, if you are not emotionally invested, you are just as likely to achieve your goals you are to win the lottery.
Now, if you have some goals written down, take a moment, stop reading this, and read your goals out loud. What do you feel? What do you see? Can you hear the sounds, smell the smell, see the colors as if you have achieved the goal? If the answer is no, the truth is, these are not your real goals (many people in sales jobs, in small business, or network marketing, are basically given an expectation of what a good goal is, but these are generally uninspiring to the individual and merely serve the someone else). You may have set them because someone asked you to, or you read it somewhere, and they are not being realized because you are not “Feeling them”. Take some time, and ask yourself what you really want to achieve. What do you really want? How will achieving these goals make you feel? How are others going to treat you different when you achieve these goals… your spouse, your family, your friends, your coworkers, and even complete strangers? Are you going to feel different when you walk into a room, go to a party, reunion, or maybe a popular restaurant? Don’t worry about how you are going to achieve them, or how long it is going to take, as we have time to work on a plan and a routine, but there is no point in starting a journey if you don’t know where you want to go. Keep going through that exercise until you truly Feel your Goals.
When you are done, you may feel mentally drained and elated at the same time. It is work, but good work. You just started the journey to achieving your goals and controlling your life. Take a couple of minutes to review those goals, and Feel your Goals before going to bed, and then again when you first wake. Now be aware of the difference when you wake up and pop out of bed. Your mornings have just changed from avoiding the day, to seizing it and everything you can accomplish!! Start Feeling your Goals, and the world if filled will limitless opportunities.
I hoped this helped some of you who may be struggling with your goals. If you found value, comment and share, and if there is anything I can do to help, or if you have any questions, let me know.